• Paige Emilee

BPD and Splitting

Updated: Aug 27, 2020

Yin-Yang says that in the good there is bad, in the bad there is good, and together that is life.

Except for Life on The Borderline.

BPD patients experience an interesting phenomenon called 'Splitting' that happens subconsciously while under high-stress, or when perceived danger/conflict arises.

When we are new to this world and we are under our mothers nurture we have no understanding of bad or good. As we evolve and develop we understand that bad and good can be held within the same being. If a child is abused before the age of development, it is challenging for them to comprehend the difference between the bad and good side of their abuser, so they don't. They form this mechanism triggered by conflict that doesnt allow for paradoxical thoughts. Black and white with no grey in between.

This can be confusing for a person with BPD because when splitting happens, the thoughts/emotions feel extremely real, and the emotional buttons are very active. A Splitting episode can last anywhere from 20 minutes to a couple of days.

Splitting can feel very uncomfortable and scary for BPD patients. This is because in the moment they feel very vulnerable, and often unheard.

If someone you love experiences splitting, it is important to remember that it is not their fault, and that their feelings come from a much deeper place. Often times triggers throw them back into original trauma, and you are not the person that they are really speaking to at that moment. Ask them, or yourself where you think these feelings are coming from. If you validate the feeling of your struggling loved one they will appreciate it massively.

Noticing physical sensations in the body is also very important. What does your body feel right before a split?

Can you catch these sensations in the moment and remove yourself, or communicate about the feelings that are arising?


To learn more about Splitting and Borderline Personality Disorder, like, and follow my socials for updates on new posts.


All my love, Paige Emilee

Your Mental Health Guru



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